Ok...I promise that my next post will contain some fun pictures on it & be more about what we have done or are doing (my hubby wants to make sure I keep posting pics on the blog as well) BUT for now, since I don't have much time but I wanted to get a post done I decided to ask you all a question....
So I always hear these phrases (or something close it), "I wish we would have done that before we had kids...." or "You are so lucky you don't have kids yet because you can do so many things..."
So My question to you is "WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE IF YOU COULD GO BACK TO BEFORE YOU HAD KIDS??" I am sure Travel is a popular answer but I really want you to think about this. Because I don't want to look back & realize that I missed so many opportunities during this time because I was just focused on the "having kids" issue. And I constantly find myself saying things like, "If we had kids I would do This or I would learn more about This!" Etc..Etc... I need to change my focus so I am going to lean on YOU to help me do this ;)
So....Tell Me :) (and you don't have to have kids to answer this because chances are you may already be doing that thing you would do ;)
Hugs & Kisses - Traci
17 comments:
I am ALWAYS telling Jer that we (mainly I) should have ran a marathon before having kids!!! The furthest I ran before I had my kids was maybe 5 miles two or three times. SO, if you have a "race" on your bucket list, get training baby cause once you have a little one to take care of it's harder to squeeze in the runs :)
P.S. It seems that you guys know how to live life to the fullest already!!!
SLEEP!! Get as much of it as you can. 'Cuz you never know when someone is going to wake up at 5am because he wet the bed and decide its time to play since he's already wide awake. We are currently eating 2nd breakfast like little hobbits and the sun isn't up yet. The alarm clock gets cuter, but doesn't come with a snooze button...
I know there are other things, but I'm too tired to think of them right now. :)
Go on as many dates with your husband as you can that aren't kid friendly - such as the movies, rock climbing, snowboarding, etc. Ahhh, I want to go snowboarding right now!
Purse...i've been thinking long and hard about this one and I know you're not gonna like it, but I think i have to agree with Lacey....traveling, going on tons of dates, and SLEEPING are AWESOME suggestions and you REALLY need to enjoy doing those things, but as silly as this sounds, those were harder for me to be motivated to do (people told me to do all of those things all the time before we had van) because they just seemed like small things that weren't big enough of a deal ya know what I mean? So, my advice would be to do a PHYSICAL goal....cause this way you will feel GREAT, and most likely you will not be able to do it after kids (not because of not being in shape, but because of time, etc). When my sis had her crazy molar pregnancy and couldn't get prego for a year, we climbed Mt. Whitney (the highest peak in the continuous US, about 15,000 ft) and it was RAD! It felt so good and was such a cool accomplishment...that will be really hard to do again. So, I know you're not the biggest fan of running, but maybe set up your iPod with some good tunes and train for a 10K or half marathon! You never know, you may love it and want to do a full! Spend some money on some good running shoes and cute running clothes....I think you'll get hooked! Or train to hike Kings Peak, its 13,518 ft which is REALLY high and would be a rad accomplishment. Or train to run the Wasatch Back! That is super fun...its shorter runs that a marathon, but just lots of them in one day...do it with a fun group of people and it will be rad. Now, that is a good one cause that for sure would be hard to do with a kid....hard to leave your baby all day/all night (its a 24 hour race)...oh man Trace, there's so many things. DO IT! I think a physical goal will be so good...it totally takes your mind off of trying to get preggers, and helps your body! And you'll look hot, feel hot and feel so proud of yourself. K, sorry for ranting. Love you!
Go golfing with Mike a lot!!! You know how much I used to golf. I wish I would have gone golfing with just me and josh more. After josh and I got married when it was just us we didn't go very much and now since I've had kids I could probably count on one hand how many times I've been. Your golf game is really improving so improve it to it's fullest while you can! Of course it's not that you can't golf after you have kids, but I give my excuse to not go cause of mostly time and finding a sitter for those hrs. It's a hassel. Go to a really fun waterpark with Mike. This will also be a fun thing to do with kids, but it won't be real enjoyable until their older and know how to swim. When it's just you and mike you can swim, go down slides, most of all relax and get a nice tan and don't have to be on the tip of your toes worrying if your child is gonna get lost or drown. I love taken Paige to the pool cause she loves the water and it's fun watching them react, but don't opt to do it often because the whole time I'm in a panic and don't really relax and enjoy myself. Then of course the sleep, dinner, movie, dating is all great stuff to not take for granted. You can still enjoy this stuff with kids, but dinner and movie type stuff is more stressful. Stressful finding sitters or if you have to take the kids remember that story i told you of that time we just wanted to have dinner with a couple of friends and I just barely started my dinner and had to leave the party cause Paige was screaming which made landen scream too. It's not always like that of course, but that was the worst out to eat experience I've ever had haha. I like lacy's idea. I always think about how cool it would be to run atleast a half marathon. We both aren't runners, but that would be a neat thing to accomplish! Go to Zumba as often as you can. I wish I would have gone to Disney Land or World before the kids to experience that as an adult, but I do look forward to experiencing with the kids in the future. You've already done that, so that's not something you really need to do haha. Plan a trip to a really fun theme park or just going to lagoon. You may have done that recently, but if you haven't, do and just enjoy it! You and Mike do so many fun things and have been blessed to go on some really great trips, so your pretty much already living it to the fullest, which is why I understand your ready for change. But keep living day by day and cherish the movie and dining and ect dates and don't take one for granted. I could see you at dinner on a date and instead of enjoying the moment you see a mother struggling with her baby to behave and your thinking, so cute I wish I had that and then the struggling mom is looking at you thinking, man I remember the days were I could enjoy dinner without having to handle a crying baby, I miss that. But isn't that how life is. People always thinking that grass is greener on the other side. Well it's not we all need to not think of the otherside and enjoy the moment and what we are doing in our lifes right now, I think I mostly learned that from you, so just like you said you don't miss on the oppurtunities that are right infront of you today. Well I just did a whole lot of typing and I don't know if any of it made sence and you probably knew it all already. But you know I love you and how I am and you love me for it so it's ok! You and Mike already are living life close to it's fullest so just keep living! Love you!
I feel like I am trying to fulfill this ALL the time! Except instead of it being just having kids, it's also am I living my 'single' life to the fullest too. The two main things for me are: 1) Create healthy habits (whether it be with exercise or food choices, I want to make sure when I am busy with a family that the 'healthy' part isn't work, just natural. 2) Always have something to look forward to or simple goal I'm working on achieving. For me, it's usually planning a trip, training for a triathlon/ race, or working on some sort of craft or sewing project. When I don't have anything I'm working on or training for, I find myself watching a lot of tv and being less motivated to much of anything. I like to blame it on the fact that I work night shift, but really I turn really idle and have less passion for everything. When I have something to look forward to, I don't have as much time to think about the things that I don't have. Another one that I would like to improve on is simply putting service in my everyday life. I read a blog about someone doing random acts of kindness to strangers and I was so impressed. Why am I not having pizza delivered to the nearby firehouse, just because? Now you've really got me thinking. What a great question.
this is a great question to ask because it's true, before you have kids you think 'i'll to more of {blank} when i have kids' and then when you DO have kids you think, 'if i didn't have kids i'd be able to {blank}',
i completely agree with every one of the comments made. those are all things i've thought,too. the only thing i can add would be TAKE A CLASS. it's always on my list of new year's resolutions and it's the one thing i have a hard time accomplishing because i can't find the time. whether it's photography, painting, reupholstery,voice lessons, dancing, karate, crafting, cooking. . . . .i'd love to learn a skill but just can't figure out how it would work with kids. i'm sure i'll fit it in one of these days but it'd be a whole lot easier if i didn't have kids. AND you'd be able to take a class WITH mike more easily rather than one of you staying home with the kids while the other goes to the class, or having to find a babysitter every time.
Finish my degree...
I wish I would've got a different education...like got to hair school, be a nurse, or a dental hygienist. Something to the effect that I could still work and be home with the kids you know. Also really enjoy your dates and going out. With my 3 going out is non existent especially since we moved away from family. Once you pay for the babysitter, dinner, and movie your out 80 bucks! So just enjoy the little things :).
I have to disagree with some of these peeps. No offense peeps. But I know many women who have ran marathons and gone to school after having kids. It's all about family, friends, and your husband being willing to give you "YOU" time. Dave let's me have time to workout and I'm starting school in the fall. People have this notion that all their time is running out, but it's not, you still have time, you just have to make it. :)
No offense taken, BUT in defending my suggestion; I've actually fit in two marathons after having two kids and yes it obviously is doable but there's no reason to disagree that it would have been much easier to accomplish before having kids to worry about (especially when you're out running for 4-5 hours at a time). Jer and I really enjoy spending time as a family!!
Traci this was a great question! These are great suggestions; obviously some of these will sound interesting to you and some won't but you'll still have a life after children; especially considering how fun you and Mike are!
A list for my response:
*Appreciate sleep
*Save more money
*Read more books
:)
That's it. Really.
I agree with a lot that has already been said, but also agree with Angie. Ran a marathon AFTER I had kids. Am back in school AFTER I had kids. You just have to learn to prioritize after kids and be more efficient with your time. I wish I would have taken the time to be more spontaneous with whatever I wanted to do before I have kids. Feel like getting a pedicure? Go. Want to take a bath? Do it. Go to the movies? An active sport? New hobby? Not that you can't do all of that with kids, but there's a lot more planning involved with kids and you can't be as spontaneous. Good question to pose. :)
Wow Ladies!! You definately gave me a lot of information...& somewhat of a little debate which was interesting to read but the question just says "what would you have done if you could go back to before having kids" Not "What could you have done that you can't do now" - haha!!
Thank you soo much for all the advice!! For one it has made me feel better w/ what Mike & I are doing but also motivated me to do more or at least APPRECIATE what we have more. I'm sure when we have kids I'll think back to this & be able to say dito to many of the things you have said...but hopefully because of this post I can still be happy with what we did accomplish or atleast accomplished when things were "easier". YOU ARE ALL THE BEST!!!
Hey, its been a while since I have read blogs and I missed Mike's birthday so happy belated birthday Mike.
I liked this question and all the answers, it was interesting to hear everyone's thoughts and made me think about it also. I would learn to surf, sail, skydive, scuba dive, and travel out of the country to new Zealand, Ireland, Australia, Thailand, Bora Bora, Fiji, etc. But to be fair, I didn't have that kind of money back then either. Have fun doing whatever awesome stuff you decide and good luck with everything!
Okay - here I go, take what you want from it . . . I definentaly like the TRAVEL more idea, but although we COULD have traveled without kids . . . I don't really think we could have AFFORDED to travel more than we did. Sleeping more is just silly . . . cause you don't need more sleep UNTIL you have kids. So don't do more of that. Heck, stay up all night, just cause you can :)
I think the biggest thing I wish I would have done is LEARN MORE NEW THINGS or at least TRY MORE NEW THINGS. There are at least 10 things that I would love to do or try right now . . . and not that I won't . . . but it will certainly take a lot more effort and planning now. Like rockclimbing - I have always known I loved it but never really gotten into it. I wish I would have really taken the time to pursue that passion when I had more time to myself. I don't regret it and will still be a professional rock climber (or close to it :)) but its going to take much more effort now. ANYTHING you think you might want to do - TRY IT NOW - find out if you like it - whether its by taking a class or trial and error or a spontaneos act - cause when you become a mommy you may only have time for a couple hobbies at a time.
You rock traci!!!
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